Monday, December 10, 2012

Happy Birthday, Peter Kropotkin

December 9th is the 170th anniversary of the birth of Peter Kropotkin, who birthed the concept of mutual aid and anarchism.

I suspect modern tonsorial practices have much to do with the state of the world today, that and ties. The constant scraping of face and neck, the tiny hair bits breathed at the barber shop, the toxic chemicals used by the average barber have all contributed to the lowering the average IQ of the American male.

Ties obviously reduce blood flow to the brain. When men turned from the loosely gathered cravat to the modern four-in-hand neck ornament, somewhere around the American (un)Civil war, brain cells began a steady decline. Now we see the results. The loosening of morals, ignorance rampant on the streets and in the halls of power. 

Who needs ties? Let's decorate our necks with the natural feature that inalterably distinguishes the male of our species from the female: a blossoming beard in all its natural variety. Thus we refute militarized conformity, economic servitude and post-industrial ennui.